Eighteen months old!

At 18 months old, Ben is large and in charge! Well, he's not quite 26 pounds, so although his belly may be large, the rest is pretty average. And we're working out who's in charge...apparently Tyler and I are supposed to be, but Ben sees it differently. It's most evident when examining the recent highchair revolt. Yes, he's hungry. Yes he wants a "nack" (snack or cracker). Sit in the highchair? No way! Bucking and screaming ensue. So we offer a seat at the new-to-us picnic table. This works for a couple of spoonfuls of ketchup, and then he yanks off his bib, declaring himself "all done". Well, alright, guess he's not hungry, we think. So we sit down to our own dinner at the table, when suddenly there is a munchkin at our (ususally Tyler's) legs begging to be picked up. Once he positions himself comfortably on a lap, he then hijacks the fork and goes to town on whatever he sees! I mean things he wouldn't touch with a 10-ft pole, like salad with balsamic dressing, must look and taste like candy to him the way he eats. So 10 minutes later, one of us (usually me) is done eating, while the other (guess who) is acting as a human booster seat while Ben eats all, or at least drools on, the whole plate of food! There goes dinner...

So the other night, Tyler (probably hungry) decided that something had to give. And after being removed from the table and bursting into an inconsolable mess, Ben was placed in his room and told he could come out when he stopped crying. I know! I'm standing in the kitchen, in tears myself, b/c I can hear "mama, mama" from behind the door. Finally he stops, probably to breathe, and Tyler quickly opened the door so we could celebrate his victory and herd him to the table. We did this a couple of times before it took. But that third time, he walked out of his room, straight to his table, climbed up on the bench and filled up those tear-stained cheeks with some yogurt! It was amazing. And a couple of minutes later, he was still there, munching and babbling away. "He loves discipline!" Tyler shouts triumphantly. Well, I wouldn't go that far....

But the stage is set. Ben has proved to us that he does understand cause/effect, so as we hit this 18-month milestone, we also enter into a new realm of this parenting world...child rearing. As I told Anna yesterday, I know that we can keep him alive. I know we can cuddle, snuggle and play with him all day long. But can I raise him well? Can I give him the freedom to be himself, while at the same time keeping him safe and pleasant to be around? I don't have those questions about Tyler; I whole-heartedly know that he will do everything in his power to raise fun loving, yet behaved and responsible children. I'm just hoping that he sees that same ability that, maybe in my uncertainty, I am not quite as quick to see in myself. Above all, I know that we're not alone in raising him and that God will make up for our shortcomings and give us grace and a sense of humor when we need it. And don't we all need it, toddler-rearing or not!

Thanks again to Ann Wade Parrish for capturing sweet moments with our Ben. Here's the bossman himself, always willing to point things out that we might otherwise miss!

"(f)ish!"

"bir(d)!"

"duh(ck)"

"mama!"